Tilden
What role do photographs and objects have in creating our memories and what becomes part of our history? What significance do objects have without the person? This work is influenced by my lens of the world as a mother. Seeing how quickly my daughter grows and changes, I attempt to capture and preserve moments and understand what influences a child to develop into the person she becomes. Experiencing loss and having a keen awareness of the fragility of life gives me the drive to find and understand moments that create memories that build a person’s history. I want to liberate what could have been that lost moment into something that becomes a part of her story.
I truly understand that life is ephemeral and think about that daily. Capturing photos is something that encapsulates those fleeting moments. These moments that could be lost and never seen or felt again. I want my daughter to keep the feeling of being a child with her throughout her life.
I want for her to have a strong sense of self along with a strong sense of place. I want her have a feeling of connectedness to her past. Pictures have power.
I truly understand that life is ephemeral and think about that daily. Capturing photos is something that encapsulates those fleeting moments. These moments that could be lost and never seen or felt again. I want my daughter to keep the feeling of being a child with her throughout her life.
I want for her to have a strong sense of self along with a strong sense of place. I want her have a feeling of connectedness to her past. Pictures have power.
Self-Portrait Through Time
My maternal family genes are very strong. When I look at my mother and grandmother I see me in the future. When I see my daughter I see myself in the past. It gives me a feeling of being more than just myself. I see a greater connection to the world. My grandmother turns 99 this month!
Indirect Self-Portrait
I am curious about how an inanimate object can take on a personality and how “things” can define a person or a time in a person’s life. I think everyone can relate to sentimental objects that have in a way defined who they are. When a person dies, these objects remain.
As she was laying in bed one night a few weeks ago, my four year old daughter whispered to Kermit “I’m sorry that I’m going to die some day. I’m sorry that you will be sad and miss me. But don’t worry, you will still be here with your other friends. You will never die, right mommy?” It is a strange feeling to think that all the stuff that surround us and become part of us will long outlast us. Inanimate objects have always played a role in my work sort of as placeholders for memories, memories of places, feelings or people. I have had these “friends” since I was a young child and could not let go of them out of all of the other many toys that I had. I have specific memories tied to each of them: Kermit = humor and carefree silliness, Bunny One Ear = place, Sweet Baby = gentle, loving father. They have all had long lives. These objects are bitter sweet reminders of a childhood that is now gone. They also remind me that my daughter’s childhood will soon be outlived by her favorite “friends”.
The stairs are a part of the home in which we live and plan to raise our daughter. The house is 110 years old and has a wonderful personality. I often think of the many people who have lived and raised children here and what role this house played in their development. How many children have learned to count by counting these stairs as they’ve walked up and down? It is interesting to me that one place or object can be a part of the memories and makeup of many people over time.
As she was laying in bed one night a few weeks ago, my four year old daughter whispered to Kermit “I’m sorry that I’m going to die some day. I’m sorry that you will be sad and miss me. But don’t worry, you will still be here with your other friends. You will never die, right mommy?” It is a strange feeling to think that all the stuff that surround us and become part of us will long outlast us. Inanimate objects have always played a role in my work sort of as placeholders for memories, memories of places, feelings or people. I have had these “friends” since I was a young child and could not let go of them out of all of the other many toys that I had. I have specific memories tied to each of them: Kermit = humor and carefree silliness, Bunny One Ear = place, Sweet Baby = gentle, loving father. They have all had long lives. These objects are bitter sweet reminders of a childhood that is now gone. They also remind me that my daughter’s childhood will soon be outlived by her favorite “friends”.
The stairs are a part of the home in which we live and plan to raise our daughter. The house is 110 years old and has a wonderful personality. I often think of the many people who have lived and raised children here and what role this house played in their development. How many children have learned to count by counting these stairs as they’ve walked up and down? It is interesting to me that one place or object can be a part of the memories and makeup of many people over time.
Kitsch
The "hole,” which one can equate to the "American Dream" is backfilled with what is seen as success determined by the “Culture Industry.” I like and relate to your example of fast food. I recently started a full time job, after being part time mom and part time teacher for 5 years. Now that I am making more money, I think about what I can do with that money to better my family. My thoughts often go to giving myself and my child rich worldly experiences by traveling, but I also, with no reservation, think of spending money on things that will save me time to spend more time with my family - a dishwasher, a self-cleaning oven, etc. My three-year-old daughter is privy to the kitsch paraphernalia - Hello Kitty, Tinker Bell, Cinderella, etc. Like mother, like daughter. We do not watch television nor do I take her to kitschy stores (Wal-Mart). I thought I could save her from the wrath of the culture of mass consumerism. Didn't happen. Downward spiral I'm afraid. Christmas consisted of Hello Kitty dress, Hello Kitty microphone, Batman toothbrush, fairy princess dress, color books, and on and on. Grandmas, aunts, and uncles cannot escape the consumer culture it seems. Hearing her squeals of excitement and watching her sing "Call Me Maybe" on that pink sparkly microphone takes away a little bit of the guilt.
What is the answer? I often feel that mass consumerism is the downfall of our "American Dreamer" society. I fantasize of getting rid of all of our possessions and moving my family to a foreign country where we can be free of this heavy weight, where we could just spend time together doing relaxing and/or adventurous things. Then, I think, well, I would need to take my temperpedic mattress and I would really miss having our ice-cream maker. My adult life is not what I expected it to be. I use to dream of being a nun. Not for religious desires, but to free myself of desires. I think it is too grandiose to free ourselves of what we have been accustomed. For me, and for many, I think it would take a very grandiose life-changing event that would allow for a change. I came across a blog by a woman who had a life-changing experience when her friend's house burned down and lost everything they had. She and her family decided they did not want to live their lives dependent of impermanent "things.” They made a family decision to live in a smaller home, sell most of their possessions, only buy what they truly needed, allow no plastic in their home, and have virtually no waste come out of their home. They do not buy gifts for each other or their kids, only give the gift of spending time together - they dot allow gifts from friends or family either. This is pure avant-garde living. I followed this blog religiously for about a year hoping that I could become one who could resist our consumer culture - I failed. ve frequented This is a series of photos taken at the Dollar Store, of which I have frequented on occasion...
What is the answer? I often feel that mass consumerism is the downfall of our "American Dreamer" society. I fantasize of getting rid of all of our possessions and moving my family to a foreign country where we can be free of this heavy weight, where we could just spend time together doing relaxing and/or adventurous things. Then, I think, well, I would need to take my temperpedic mattress and I would really miss having our ice-cream maker. My adult life is not what I expected it to be. I use to dream of being a nun. Not for religious desires, but to free myself of desires. I think it is too grandiose to free ourselves of what we have been accustomed. For me, and for many, I think it would take a very grandiose life-changing event that would allow for a change. I came across a blog by a woman who had a life-changing experience when her friend's house burned down and lost everything they had. She and her family decided they did not want to live their lives dependent of impermanent "things.” They made a family decision to live in a smaller home, sell most of their possessions, only buy what they truly needed, allow no plastic in their home, and have virtually no waste come out of their home. They do not buy gifts for each other or their kids, only give the gift of spending time together - they dot allow gifts from friends or family either. This is pure avant-garde living. I followed this blog religiously for about a year hoping that I could become one who could resist our consumer culture - I failed. ve frequented This is a series of photos taken at the Dollar Store, of which I have frequented on occasion...